Turk, if I decide to keep my last name after we get married, that’s no big deal right?
Of course not baby, we’ll just have one of those modern marriages where the couple don’t love each other. –Carla and Turk

Dr Reid, this is not bring your problems to work day, this is just work day. –Dr Kelso

You look unhappy. I like that. –Janitor

Anyway, this is the end of a major chapter in our lives, and you know what? I am going to take you out tonight, yes sir, we are going to get some dinner, we’ll get a nice bottle of wine.
It sounds like you’re asking me out on a man-date.
Turk, why are you so afraid of loving me? –JD and Turk

Your ex-wife, she’s the answer.
Um, things that ruined my life, things that took half my money, things with sharp edges! –JD and Dr Cox

Dude, what were her boobs like?
Todd, I’m standing right here.
I’m sorry, what are you boobs like? –Todd and Elliot

Luckily for Turk revenge is a dish best served cold, not unlike this tapioca pudding. –JD

No matter how hard I try, I cannot stop constantly narrating my life. –JD